Oct 042012

Brandon Vogt reviews a product from ABCatholic a Catholic media company based in Charlotte, NC.  As he notes some people have “christened their work the “Catholic Baby Einstein””

Some years ago I did this parody:

As a parent you want your child to grow up and to be healthy, smart, and happy and you seek every advantage to give your child a leg up in this direction. Though while these are goods in themselves you also realize that your most important job as a parent is to help your child get to Heaven. Sin makes you stupid and holiness makes you smart and joyful even in difficult situations.

Though you wonder how best can you help hour child to grow in the Lord and in the Path of holiness? It seems there are so many tools and activities for kids for a range of topics that offer everything except what is most important and the pearl of great price.

That is where our new company Baby Augustine steps in and “Where Holiness Begins.” Baby Augustine offers a plethora of holiness developmentally appropriate products for babies and toddlers.

The Catholic parent is the primary faith educator of the child.and we at Baby Augustine are here to assist you in the role as the first teachers of your children in the way of faith. You can’t outsource your responsibility to others, but Baby Augustine can help you and your child grow along the path of holiness. What makes Baby Augustine products unlike any other is that they are created from a baby’s point-of-view and incorporate a combination of real world objects, music, art, language, liturgy, prayer, poetry, and nature — providing you an opportunity to introduce your baby to the world around them that God has created for us in playful and enriching ways.

We think that if only Saint Monica had access to our products she might not have had to shed so many tears as a young Augustine had fallen in the Pagan world around him and into dualism via manichaeism. Baby Augustine takes advantage of the teachings of the adult Saint Augustine so that your child never has to lament “Late have I loved you, O Beauty ever ancient, ever new, late have I loved you!” Don’t let you baby have a restless heart, but a heart that rests in he who created and loves him.

So just check out some of our great product that will open up your baby or toddler to beauty so that he may always seek beauty and holiness.

What better than to start your child off with Baby Augustine’s series of baby-approved Gregorian Chant CDs! Monophonic liturgical chant which originated in Monastic life is the perfect fit for introducing your child to beauty and the liturgy. This music will lift him up and prepare him using plainchant which as the Second Vatican Council said “Should be given pride of place in liturgical services.”

Your child can also learn from our great DVDs such as “Baby Palestrina”, “Baby’s First Latin Words”, and “Baby’s Pilgrimage to Rome.”

Of course reading is an important part of the life of your child and you should be reading to him early on and encouraging him to read. Baby Augustine provide books that your child will love hearing and reading.

What better than the Baby Augustine Baby Bible that is totally interactive. When your child handles the book it will say “Pick it up and read it” just like what St. Augustine heard as he picked it up and selected at random Romans 13:13-14 and finally set him on the path from his sin. Our interactive Baby Bible lets your child do the same. When he opens up a page at random the book then reads it to him! They will be thrilled by the scripture they will hear.

We have many great books in our Baby Augustine store such as “Baby’s First Catechism”, “Moral Theology for Toddlers”, our very popular “Read the black, do the red”, “The Spirit of the Liturgy for 3 to 5 year olds”, “The Child’s Guide to Jesus of Nazareth” by Pope Benedict XVI, and “Theology of the Baby” by Christopher West.

Baby Augustine also has great toys like St. Peter’s Keys which will provide your child hours of fun “binding and loosing.” Let your child learn about the glory of the Church early that that the can learn what St. Augustine meant when he said “You cannot have God as your Father unless you have the Church as your mother” and “I would not believe the Gospels if it was not for the Church.”

You will be amazed at how effective our products are as you see your baby make the sign of the cross before taking their bottle and watch as they reach out the Holy Water font as the enter the Church. What more can you want for your child but holiness and an appreciation of the Church that will never leave them.

Now we can’t guarantee that your child will make it to Heaven because of a little thing called free will. But no doubt we all need a little advantage in living a life of holiness and what better than Baby Augustine who grew up to be on the Church’s most influential saints and a Doctor of the Church. Pope Benedict XVI especially loves Saint Augustine and so will your child. So instead of purple dinosaurs and sponges instructing your children, turn to Baby Augustine.

Baby Augustine is “Where Holiness Begins!”

Caution: Baby Augustine will be ineffective if your child sees their parents act contrary to the path of holiness as taught by Baby Augustine products. All children are equipped with an especially sensitive hypocrisy detector fine tuned to their parents.

  4 Responses to “Before “Catholic Baby Einstein””

  1. I’ll take two.

  2. And the irony is…..our three-month-year-old son is actually named Augustine 🙂

  3. Love it!

  4. You know, I bet that Georgian chant one would be soothing for babies.

 Leave a Reply

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>