May 272012
 

Father Z does an excellent parody, and I measure this by the “hmm, is this parody or not” test.

NCFishwrap EXCLUSIVE

ROME – Joining forces with the Women’s Ordination Conference, the Leadership Conference of Women Religious has enlisted the services of Fr. Ray Bourgeois, MM, in an effort to secure the release of the Pope’s Butler from a Vatican jail cell where he awaits trial for stealing and disclosing classified papal and Holy See documents to the press.

Likening the Pope’s Butler to Daniel Ellsberg of Pentagon Papers fame, Sr. R.U. Kidding, a Daughter of Charity and co-mentor of the LCWR, said that the Pope’s Butler was a “political prisoner” and that the Vatican was “torturing” him and should release him as the hero he is.

“Yes, the Vatican is just as mediveal as we have always said it was. This just proves it.”, reiterated Sr Randi McNulty, a Sister of Mercy and another LCWR co-mentor.

When questioned about the possibility that crimes were committed, Bourgeois shot back, “Some needs outweigh outdated male-made rules. We call on the Vatican gendarmes to free that butler and free him now. Free The Vatican 1!”

Bourgeois, co-spokesperson and famed rights champion said, “The butler is in solitary confinement in a Vatican jail for trying to bring transparency to the highest levels of Vatican intrigue. We stand in solidarity with all those oppressed by male-hierarchical power.”

A clearly angry Sr. Kidding said, “He struck a blow for equality and they’re making him a scapegoat.”

Visibly moved, Bourgeois added, “This guy’s… a hero.”

There have been unconfirmed reports of nuns in pants suits with scaling ladders at the Vatican walls.

For more information visit the organization’s website: FreeTheVatican1.org.

I certainly won’t be surprised if life imitates parody once again.

  4 Responses to “LCWR denounces arrest of Pope’s valet”

  1. My, what a bitter group of people they are! I’m minded that I read this on the Monday after Pentecost and it brought yesterday’s 2nd Reading to mind (Galatatians 5:16-25.) about the gifts of The Holy Spirit. This group of feuding, wrangling, jealous, bad tempered and quarrelsome, disagreeing and factional ‘religious’ are in dire need of love, joy, peace, kindness, goodness, trustfulness, gentleness and self-control. Maybe less venom and more prayer would be in order.

  2. They failed to reference how the same thing was done to Galileo hundreds of years ago. And,besides, what is so objectionable about stealing? And now we break so that the Sisters in LCWR can all go and have their hair permed at the beauty parlor.

  3. One of the Vatican’s biggest scandals in decades appeared to be widening today with reports that an Italian cardinal may be part of a power struggle involving leaked documents, corruption and intrigue

    snip

    Various theories have surrounded her disappearance, linking her kidnapping to an attempt to free the Turkish gunman who shot John Paul in 1981, or to alleged Vatican financial dealings with a Rome criminal gang.

    http://www.cbc.ca/news/world/story/2012/05/28/vatican-scandal-monday.html

    Are you sure this is a holy institution created by a god? I like what the Pope says here:

    >Addressing the faithful in Saint Peter’s Square on Sunday, the Pope said: “The wind is shaking the house of God, but it is not collapsing.”

    He says “wind” as if it’s an external force beyond the Vatican’s control and influence, that they’re victims of circumstance!

    I guess it’s better than admitting the reality.

  4. Ah yes, the CBC, that bulwark of fair and knowledgeable reporting about all things Catholic. No wonder your ideas about the Church are so confused.
    And would you say that the wind is external to the atmosphere or the Earth?

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