Being that this is the first Sunday of Advent I thought it might be useful to give some information about this season. Advent is a shortened form of the the word Advertisement, of course you probably already knew that. This time of year we get blasted by advertisements day and night to buy gifts and to attend sales. There are some groups that contend that Advertisement actually starts on Black Friday and that this is in fact the first day of the Celebration that merchandiser consider Good Friday. During the season of Advertisement we are suppose to be of good cheer for some amorphous reason that is never quite mentioned. Rumor has it that it all leads up to the event of some child born a while ago that takes place on Christmas Day. Who this child was is not important just that we should know that the season is all about family and buying stuff. During Advertisement people say Happy Holiday’s to each other. The reason for this is that during this time Malls decorate with lots of Holly so people have considered this to be Holly days. There are also other joyful greetings like Season Greetings and 40 percent off. People spend time in thanks that they have not yet exceeded their credit limit and they might forget that they have a Savior, but they will remember the savings. During the season of Advertisement the days are still 24 hours but are measured in shopping days instead. It is also a tradition for this season to be some what penitential. Penances such as having to park in overflow parking two miles away from the mall are common. After Christmas comes Advertisementide. This is the ad season of after Christmas sales and even more discounts. Later on in the shopping season comes the season of Lent. This is because you have to get money lent to you to pay off your shopping bills.
There are also some customs associated with Advertisement such as the Advertisement Wreath. Each week you take all of your junk mail and roll it up and tighten it with a rubber band and place it in your Advertisement Wreath. The third week it is traditional to use advertisements from red tag sales. You can also make or order a Advertisement Calendar, though most calendars come advertisements this is a special edition where you mark off shopping days so you know when to panic when you haven’t got everything on your list. So relax and have a happy Advertisement for whatever reason we are suppose to be sellebrating.
15 comments
It’s funny, but also sad because it’s true.
Thanks, Jeff! Good stuff!
I’m not sure if these tears are from laughing so hard or from sorrow because this is really how so many people view this season.
You’ve outdone yourself, Mr. Miller.
Related article:
CHRISTMAS OVERKILL
Great post, Jeff.
BMP
Seriously, last night, I attempted to purchase an Advent wreath. Walmart and Target both don’t sell them.
So, does the Vatican Card work while sellebrating during Advertisement days?
Just try to buy an Advent Calendar…especially one without Santas and elves….
Sams Club has wreaths made from real pine in. I wanna buy one but not yet. It is my understanding that you take one of those and decorate it and put 4 candle holders on it and voila.
As for the gifts I have explained to my children that Jesus was givin gifts at His birth so that those around Him could celebrate His birth and life. He has many gifts waiting for us in heavan where He wants to spend eternity with us but the gifts we give to them and others are because Jesus has so much in heavan its His way of sharing His birthday with those of us still here on earth without Him. All that we have is because of His generosity.
Now I did look at advertisments but when you have 5 kids to buy for, and they know theres no santa, you have to buy at the best price. I think its sad that Christ is left out for so many people. They are missing the best part.
Have any of you ever read the C.S. Lewis piece “Xmas and Christmas: A Lost Chapter from Herodotus” from “God in the Dock”?
It may be found here: http://www.people.virginia.edu/~cjs2m/meaning/xmasandchristmas.html
It is very similar in tone.
Thanks, Matt. Will check it out.
Loved it! Especially Lewis’ last line:
“…But it is not likely that men, even being barbarians, should suffer so many and great things in honour of a god they do not believe in….”
I love to freak the mundanes by shouting “Happy New Year!” Especially my “friends” who whine about having “the Christian New Year” “imposed” on them, when it went by without their even noticing. (Funny, I didn’t know that Julius Caesar was Christian.)
I wish people would stop having buttons pushed by mentioning “Christmas” or “christian”. Honestly, if people don’t want to celebrate the New Year(for example, Will’s “friends”), since they believe it to be “Christian”, then they can live in 2005 for the rest of their life if they wanted to! Or just not celebrate at all! Nothing is stopping them! It’s-just-so-FRUSTRATING! nothing is being imposed on them! They have free will! And it would help if people got facts about their holidays straight. What’s the point in celebrating a meaningless holiday? Argh!!!!
Holidays are just like everything else. They have changed from their original meaning. “Dog” used to mean degrading. NOW, it means “my friend”. Holidays were first festivals of thanks. True, merchants have made it a sale promotion time, but I still hold to the “thankfulness” of the holidays and sharing fellowship with family and frinds.
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