St. Joseph is the Rodney Dangerfield of saints. He just can’t get no respect. First off he was roundly ignored for the first half of Church history and when painted was not painted alone. Devotion slowly developed after the first millenium, built up some steam in the 14th century and by the 16th century devotion was flourishing. So he finally gets his due with churches and people being named after him and what happens. Why of course he starts getting buried in the ground by people to sell their houses.
Conversations about this popup from time to time in St. Blogs and recently there have been newspaper articles on this. Now it is bad enough they bury him in the ground, but to place him upside down as if this will get his intercessory attention to me seems kind of like a Catholic Voodoo statue. I idea of doing things to statues to get a saints attention for me is rather creepy. I have several statues throughout the house that at time have fallen to injury and subsequently have things like hands superglued back on. If the Catholic Voodoo statue phenomenon had any basis then I am really sorry for those broken hands and assorted chipped off body parts.
Now if burying St. Joseph upside down is better than right side up, then why stop there? Why not make the statue as uncomfortable as possible to get your house really moving.
First off why not try the Abu Ghraib technique on St. Joseph to humiliate him into real estate action?
If you have a drippy faucet why not put the Chinese water torture to work on St. Joseph the worker. Get to work selling my house or I will wash your clothes right off you.
Or if you have a plastic statue setup a slowly dripping bottle of finger nail polish remover. That ought to get him interceding before he melts into a plastic blob.
But if you really want to sell your house fast and don’t want to mess around with less effective St. Joe incentive packages then you just have to get this kit coming to a Catholic book store near you.
Bury them both together and in no time you will be signing closing papers. With Jack’s supercomputer disguised as a normal cell phone and his harsh interrogation techniques you just know Jack will take no time in getting St. Joseph busy interceding for your property. Though if you later make it to Heaven you might want to dodge meeting St. Joe for a bit first.
* For details on the history of devotion to St. Joseph see Sandra Miesel’s excellent article on the topic and send a few prayer’s her way since her husband died today.