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In a surprise partnership between Tom Monaghan of Ave Maria University and Johnson & Johnson’s Windex™ a new line of commercials is scheduled to come out. Inspired by the proposed design of the Ave Maria University Oratory this partnership will soon roll out this new ad.
This new oratory has met with both support and opposition. The local Window Washer Union is really happy about the employment opportunities. Some more traditional Catholics are worried that they will have to tone down the homilies since people preaching in glass churches can’t throw stones. A local flower shop owner is concerned that the Church might start growing plants in direct competition of his green house. This new oratory is also going to break ground in confessional technology that is in line with the glass theme of the church.
Inspired by the plastic domes used in the television series Get Smart for privacy. These modern noise canceling booths with advanced space aged plastic will ensure no one will be able to eavesdrop on your reconciliation (except you know who).
In related news. Drs. Schuller I & II surprised by the similar nature of the oratory and the Crystal Cathedral have decided to take down the Crystal Cathedral and replace it with a totally new design.
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This post came about because of Mark Shea posting: “Actually, I kinda like it…But then, I do have visions of the next entry at the Curt Jester with a photoshopped gigantic bottle of Windex built as a permanent structure next to the chapel. Over to you, Jeff.”
23 comments
Oh no, in the Cone of Silence Confessional, everyone can hear you *except* the priest. Wouldn’t that violate Canon Law or something? ๐
Hey, Jeff, great minds and all. I thought of the Crystal Cathedral too! ๐ I also thought it bore a striking resemblance to the aerodynamic chapels built by Iglesia ni Cristo so that the chapels, congregants and all, can be swooshed into heaven at the Rapture.
Any reference to “The Cone of Silence” will always cause me to crack up. You’re killing me Mr. Miller.
Cone of what? I can hear what you’re…
I had to laugh out loud when I saw the new design for the Schullers’ church.
“people preaching in glass churches can’t throw stones”
There’s reason enough to scrap the plans.
Except for the Get Smart touch–great!
Another classic from Jeff…
One question though: why is the sky orange? Is it the fumes coming out of that greenhouse? Err, chapel? ๐
I thought it was a sky saturated with the OrangeGlo Windex they’ll need to keep the place clean.
Does anyone know what the cost of window washing would run? I have a suspicion that cost alone exceeds the budgets of many parishes.
The cone of silence is the best thing that ever happened on spy movie. That thing should be put into a museum.
I think it’s a joke to consider it a place in which to meditate. Tom Monaghan spent that much when his Domino’s Pizza workers can’t afford to pay attention. A decent wage and overtime would allow his employees to have a modest home.
Likewise, the New Orleans businessman that wanted to remain anonymous; no wonder, his $5 million dollar “gift” was from money he stole from his workers who worked and never got paid a decent living wage that would afford them NOT luxuries but basics.
Building fancy places to worship or to meditate in some “oratory” does NOTHING when you have a LOT of bills you need to be paying! Ezekiel Chapter 34.
I guess it’s easy for the rich to “give” , when they are “giving” with money they stole in unpaid wages due the workers that made them rich to start with. They also claim to raise the minimum wage will abnkrupt them. Then they’ll spend $240 million on this glass dump.
“Justice” – that NO EXCUSE!
The sexual abuse settlements had many Archdiocese claiming to be so “needy” for money and so poor, they were asking parishioners to dig again to pay for the crimes of their priests. Why not sell the land this monolith is built on?
With so many people standing in unemployment lines and trying to make do on a minimum wage, people standing in soup lines and shelters, victims of sexual abuse and financial abuse by priests, nuns and and deacon businessmen who steal wages and life savings of people who have worked hard all their lives making an honest living. It is obscene that the church that claimed the abuse victims were only suing to, “get some money”.
After reading about the Oratory of Ave Maria, the church leadership’s greed – it becomes sickening to think of anyone being comfortable in a place like this after what they take from others.
Slapping a 65 foot crucifix on what is said to be the $240 MILLION FIRST PHASE …..Pleeeease! U.S. Archbishops ~ don’t talk about your sex abuse victims want of money in those lawsuits. This building confirms that the church leadership are full of pure greed and NOT your victims.
The New Orleans businessman chose to remain anonymous in his $5 MILLION dollar gift ; is probably one of the millions of businessmen who oppose minimum wage increase to a living wage because they also claim it will bankrupt them! No wonder one remains anonymous! That $5 million dollars was money he stole from his poor workers in America to “GIVE” to you what he robbed from an honest upright Christian worker.
I don’t know who is worse, the businessman that gives you alms or the pedophile priests, or the Archbishops that defend them all in their terror and torment of the poor and abused in Christ. Building fancy houses of “worship” like this does nothing when you have a LOT of bills you need to be paying! Ezekiel Chapter 34.
Think how many modest homes could have been built for the homeless families in America with $ 240 MILLION dollars! A church that holds 3,500 ZOMBIES offers nothing to help others. THEY are the ones worthy of the money you wasted on this glass dump!
Go ahread and fire. They could not be any more hurt than what has already been done to them!
Businessmen always use this threat as an excuse.
The fact is, the next time Tom wants someone to flip a pizza – ask those glass beams of the oratory to bend down mighty low to do it for you and see how far you get. Any “business” worth it’s salt that cannot or refuses to pay a decent wage should NOT be in business anyway.
the last time minimum wage was raised in this country, the business men lied and said they would all go bankrupt. It did not show a blip of affect on Wall Street like they claimed it would.
Favors were done for businesses that made these rediculous claims and instead of the workers getting their increase in full it was implemented
over a three year period. It’s taking three years to give these service workers they money that should have been theirs long ago for their work. The Bible says that a man is worthy id his hire. If ‘ol Tom cannot afford to pay them – he ought to get out until a true religion worth having will demonstrate a love for his fellow man not to steal from them, their rightful wages. The minimum wage should go up again and again and it should be paid in full and NOT implemented over three years – until this kind of waste is stopped.
Sounds like those at the Oratory are planning on staying here after the rapture.
I think the Oratory is obscene with the workers in this country depending on FULL payment for services rendered to make those businessmen. The workers at Domino’s Pizza make a pitiful wage they call a minimum. It’s not human. It’s a disgrace that these workers do not have a modest home after working for the rich man that built this place on the wages he pays them. The bells? What are they for? To call the hogs for more supper while those who work for you are starving just to pay their bills?
“Cattle mooing” ~ Attention all workers who have had their wages denied by men who want to appear as if they are good and “giving” – go to work and do NOTHING but mooooooo all day long!
Nursing home staff…
Sit and mooooo all day long like a cow and see how much of a benefit it is to you.
This is what your glass dump benefits the poor working class that are the only ones there to actually help you by the WORK they do and the hours they put in for you to accomplish that goal.
All nursing assistants….do NOTHING now but sit there and mmmmoooooo ~ make like a cow.
Apparently, that’s what they are looking for in their desire for “meditation”. Give it to them!
I’m disgusted with the glass dump!
America works for a living… a decent living …and this money could have gone a looooong way to provide a living for our families and put a humble and modest roof over the heads of the working poor in this country!
Hope your Oratory of the Ave Maria will take as good a care of you as any nurse or caregiver.
Next time you yell for a servant of the Lord ~ to help with nursing care ~ ask those cold glass walls to bend mighty low to help you and to bring that spoon to your hungry lips. Remember the money that was denied them so that this glass monster could be built so you could have a place to meditate to hear the cows moo!
Be sure to call those cows home to give all those baths
in that nursing home – perhaps they can all come to lick you clean.
No wonder nurses aides are angry and fed up!
1st – I belive Tom sold Domino’s.
Everyone I’ve ever known to work at Domino’s was someone trying to make extra money, not someone trying to raise a family. Jobs such as these aren’t meant to be a living wage (and they shouldn’t be).
Newsflash – the poor people generally love splendid churches. I met a homeless guy in Washington who absolutely loved St. Matthew’s cathedral, and couldn’t stop going on about it to me. To him, that was faith inspiring. By contrast, the only people who hated the beauty of the churches were the rich, liberal snobs in our group. Leave it to the rich to find ugliness in beauty.
By the way, Monaghan no longer owns Domino’s – he sold it 6 years ago. I’ll bet you didn’t bother checking that out either. And let’s be honest – most people working for Domino’s are teens in school trying to get some money – not inherently poor people.
If significant amounts of money were not spent on churches, we would not have the Sistine Chapel, St. Peter’s, or any of the beautiful cathedrals in our own countries. I remember when I was in Florence, the volunteer who showed us around the Duomo stressed how the locals (at the time of its building) were so proud of their cathedral. They knew that they would never be rich, but that EVERYONE, the poor and the rich, could attend mass in a beautiful, awe-inspiring church.
If significant amounts of money were not spent on churches, we would not have the Sistine Chapel, St. Peter’s, or any of the beautiful cathedrals in our own countries. I remember when I was in Florence, the volunteer who showed us around the Duomo stressed how the locals (at the time of its building) were so proud of their cathedral. They knew that they would never be rich, but that EVERYONE, the poor and the rich, could attend mass in a beautiful, awe-inspiring church.
Uh, Pat? Did you fall out of the wrong side of bed this morning? What point were you trying to make, exactly?
An all-glass building in Florida is going to require significant air conditioning, or it will be hot as heck……
He did sell and he is using the proceeds (what is left after taxes and care of his family) to support orthodox Catholic projects. There are grade schools and other things that we are unaware of. People shouldn’t be throwing stones at people who “live in glass houses.” ๐
An interesting article on Thomas S. Monaghan and the new Ave Maria University near the very small town of Immokalee, Florida is at: http://members.aol.com/kq4ym/avemaria.html
The Holy Spirit moves people in ways none of us can comprehend. The only thing we can do is listen to the call, pray about it and act on it. Jesus said that we will be persecuted because of Him. Why is it that whenever something so good can come from something else it meets heavy resistance? Because the devil does not want it. Why settle for a few gems when you can have a perfect diamond? Well that it what Tom M. is trying to do with Ave Maria University, he is trying to make a perfect diamond because that is what God wants. The devil defiantly has his plans to and if he cannot stop the campus from growing all together then he will try and stop it from being what it really could be, he will throw everything he can in the way to keep it from being the great place it should be, with a grade A place of worship to our Lord. I totally agree with carrie 100% because without putting money into things such as Churches, you would never get to see sites like St. Peters, and one of my personal favorites the Adoration Chapel on the campus of Our Lady of Corpus Christi college. When you walk into a place like that you know God is there, you feel Him all around you. I ask that you pray for the university because criticism is everywhere and even if you are not a huge supporter of AMU God๏ฟฝs will be done. God Bless
It’s the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen. Tom should have his head examined.
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