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The Curt Jester

"It is the test of a good religion whether you can joke about it." GKC

Punditry

I’m Shocked I tell you

by Jeffrey Miller July 25, 2010July 25, 2010
written by Jeffrey Miller


Toni Tortorilla [Source]
I am shocked at this picture! Doesn’t this women “priest” know that glass chalices are not allowed. Surely she has read Redemptionis Sacramentum. After all women priests are just like male priests and they only differ with the Church on the issue of women’s ordination and just want to be obedient to Jesus and his Church.

It always seems to me that the real reason these women don’t become Episcopalians instead is that they would get no attention if they did so. This way they can be “brave” in opposing that male dominant church they so hate and want to be part of. That when it comes down to it, it is not only one issue they disagree on — but a whole agenda comes along with it. Show me a women “priest” who defends the Church’s sexual teachings and has an orthodox theological view and I will show you that the bearded Spock must live in that same universe. These women would be a much closer fit with Episcopalians since their theology and antics would fit right in

As I have quipped before, where are the women who feel a call to the priesthood that want to celebrate the Extraordinary form of the Mass. Where are the traddy women priests and why is it predominately women with butch haircuts that feel this call?

From the article the picture was taken from:

Q: Is there a biblical basis for ordaining women?

A: In 1976, a report of the Pontifical Biblical Commission looked at Scripture and found no justification in the New Testament for excluding women from the priesthood.

I guess I am shocked again by this lie. I have a copy of this report and it says not such thing.

“It does not seem that the New Testament by itself alone will permit us to settle in a clear way and once and for all the problem of the possible accession of women to the presbyterate,”

This statement from the commission is nowhere close to how it is often portrayed by the women’s ordination movement. The reason I have the commissions report is because I had seen this claim before. The report goes on to say:

The masculine character of the hierarchical order which has structured the church since its beginning thus seems attested to by scripture in an undeniable way. Must we conclude that this rule must be valid forever in the church?

…In fact there is no proof that these ministries were entrusted to women at the time of the New Testament.

And of course this preistette does not mention that the Pontifical Biblical Commission did not found any evidence for ordaining women in the Bible either. It is Jesus’ example that shows this to be his will and of course the constant teaching of the Church from the beginning on this. The only women priests in the early church were heretical groups like Collyridianism. And of course as then-Cardinal Ratzinger replied in his Responsum ad Dubium “This teaching requires definitive assent, since, founded on the written Word of God, and from the beginning constantly preserved and applied in the Tradition of the Church, it has been set forth infallibly by the ordinary and universal Magisterium.”

July 25, 2010July 25, 2010 33 comments
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Punditry

Unbelievable

by Jeffrey Miller July 21, 2010
written by Jeffrey Miller

I was looking through Florida statutes and I discovered that those who impersonate police officers, sheriffs, government officials, etc have committed a felony and the circumstances determines if it is first, second, or third degree.  Sentencing for this can be 30, 15, or 5 years with longer sentencing for a life felony.  These crimes are covered under statues 775.082, s. 775.083, here in Florida.

Looking over some other offenses I was shocked to find that unlawful sexual activity with minors while also a felony came under the exact same statues in regard to punishment!  Or the fact that aggravated assault or battery is also a felony along with child sexual abuse and rape.

I tell you I am totally shocked that Florida law equates child sexual abuse with impersonation of a government official.   Unbelievable.  How dare they equate these two crimes as both felonies.  I urge everybody who is a resident of the state of Florida to write their state senate and state congress to have this changed.  Even more disturbing is that it seems that this is not just a fluke for the State of Florida, but seems to have infected all states in that they see this impersonation a felony just like child sexual abuse.

The conclusion to think that each state considers impersonation of a government official to be equated with child sexual abuse is a reasonable conclusion if you have the same mindset of those who freaked out over the revised norms (Normae de Gravioribus Delictis) issued by the Holy See that codify seven modifications originally made by Pope John Paul II and confirmed by Pope Benedict in 2005.  The conclusion of so many bigoted and uninformed pundits is that the Holy See is deliberating equating child sexual abuse with the attempted ordination of women.  No other conclusion is possible for them.

The case can be made that including women’s ordination in this document was not a prudent thing to do.  Though the only reason that it was not prudent was that people would willfully misinterpret it and approach it from an adversarial view.  It does not matter to them that the gravity of the items listed did not change at all and only restates these offenses and their application to the law.  The simple fact is that they don’t understand why women can’t be ordained and so are mad about this in the first place and will use any opportunity to rant about this regardless of the conclusions they must force to come to.  If you say that it reasonable to infer that the intent of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith to directly  equate women’s ordination as being exactly equal in every way with priestly abuse of children than you in fact are not being reasonable.

Plus of course they do not understand why women attempting to be ordained constitute such a serious crime in Church law.  If somebody decides that they are called to be a doctor or a county sheriff and then have some group declare them to be of such a profession and to start doing these jobs of their own volition, pretty much anybody can see why they are not in fact a doctor or government official regardless of their desire.  Both the government and doctors have stringent procedures regarding these professions and control them.  The Catholic Church also has rules and procedures concerning the priesthood and have the faculty to determine the theology of the priesthood and who can be a priest.  But of course secularists seem to think they can dictate this to us and make no attempt to understand the theology of the priesthood and instead head straight for a false view of equality.

These women who are faux priests do serious damage to those who follow them and of course to themselves.  Where there are women “priests” there is no Eucharist, confession, sacrament of the sick, or valid marriage.  To support women priests is to rob the faithful of these sacraments and to create a spirituality anchored in disobedience.

Funny how the same people who would go postal if a white actor played Othello can think of no reasons whatsoever why women can’t image Christ In Persona Christi.  They would reduce Christ to a genderless being and his being a man meaning nothing at all.  This as always is the path of heresies that grow from see Jesus as something other than fully God and fully man (as a human person) and as a man.

Though the bigots will just not get passed that their can be a theology of the priesthood that is not just simply sexism imposed by a an all male hierarchy.

For those who seriously want to know why the Church teaches what was Christ’s will.

Catholic Priesthood and Women: A Guide To The Teaching Of The Church by Sr. Sara Butler, MSBT which I previously reviewed. In 1978, Sr. Butler headed a task force of the Catholic Theological Society of America that came out in support of female priests. Later though she realized the error of the arguments made and wrote this book that rebuts them and totally supports the Church’s teaching.

July 21, 2010 13 comments
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Book Review

Two Bloggers, Two Books

by Jeffrey Miller July 20, 2010
written by Jeffrey Miller

I recently finished Treasures Holy and Mystical: A Devotional Journey for Today’s Catholics by Father Philip Powell which I read as nightly meditations over a period of time.  Reviewing a prayer book is not the simplest of tasks and doing so for a collection of prayers can be even more difficult.  This is not the case with this prayer book which both bows to tradition and yet does so in a fresh way.  This recent book by popular Catholic blogger Fr. Powell exceeded my expectations.  I expected a solid collection of prayers, just not the cool Dominican outlook that shows itself within.  This prayer book contains Novenas, Litanies, and a Rosary meditation.

Fr. Powell has combined prayers and meditations from scripture, the treasury of the Church,  the Church Fathers, and his own writing.  He has created various Novenas which include ones based on Pope Benedict XVI encyclicals Spe Salvi and Sacramentum Caritatus, Vatican II document Dei Verbum, along with three intriguing Mystical Novenas.  I really loved the Mystical Novenas with a Dominican bent that provided much intellectual food for thought.  For example the Novena via Negativa explores what we know of God by exploring what God is not (apophatic theology); or the Novena via Positiva which takes the opposite approach (cataphatic theology).

Even the introduction was well worth reading on what mysticism means and how it applies to everyone of us.   For example he says “By denying your call to the mystical life, you deny the very vocation you took at baptism.”

This book will not get lost among my stack of books, but will be a reference to me and is a book of Novenas I will actually use.

Another book I recently read is by another Catholic blogger Taylor Marshall.  The Crucified Rabbi: Judaism and the Origins of Catholic Christianity is I believe his first book with another book coming out later this year.  I started reading his blog back before he came into the Catholic Church.  At one time he was an Episcopal priest and the book starts off with a chapter on his conversion.  The subject of Judaism in relation to the Church was one of the things that got him to think more deeply on the Catholic Church and how it effected his conversion was an interesting story in and of itself.

The brunt of the book though is about Jesus, the Church and its relationship to Judaism.  I really enjoyed the writing style and the series of short chapters that build upon themselves and presents the information in a coherent manner.  While I was aware of some of the information contained within, I learned a lot more on the subject about all the parallels between Catholicism and Judaism.  Topics such as Old Testament Jewish Vestments and Catholic Vestments,  Temple/Cathedral, Synagogue/Parish, Jewish/Catholic feast days, were all very interesting and along the way there is solid theology and apologetics on Jesus along with a detailed list of the prophesies that Jesus fulfilled.  It really is amazing all of the parallels and more than just a introduction to the subject.

I thoroughly enjoyed this book and look forward to his next one.

July 20, 2010 1 comment
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Pro-life

Baby’s first Tweet

by Jeffrey Miller July 20, 2010July 20, 2010
written by Jeffrey Miller

As a satirist stories like the one below annoy me for taking possible material and moving it into the real world.

Long commutes and longer workdays force many expecting parents to spend considerable time away from one another. Whether separated by hundreds of miles, or by a simple daily commute, the separation can be heart wrenching for the upcoming parents as they struggle to support one another for this major change in their lives. The Kickbee is intended to help bridge the physical gap between spouses by enabling pregnant mothers to share the experience of a baby kicking in the womb with the fathers…an event that is normally only experienced in close proximity through the touch of the father’s hand to her belly.

The Kickbee is a stretchable band worn by a pregnant mother. Vibration sensors are attached directly to the band, and are triggered by movement underneath. The band and electronics are covered in a soft fabric cover for design and comfort. A microcontroller in the garment captures the movement and transmits the signals wirelessly to a computer running a custom application.

The application receives the sensor values and analyzes them. When a kick is detected, a message is posted to the social messaging service Twitter via its API (Application Programming Interface). Twitter makes it easy to share these short messages of “I kicked Mommy!” with family and friends, and allows them to be sent as text messages to any mobile phone in the world. The Twitter account can also act as a data log that can be accessed later for visualization or archiving. [Kickbee.net]

Well at least Planned Parenthood won’t be getting in on the action. Baby’s Last Tweet just doesn’t sound so good.

July 20, 2010July 20, 2010 2 comments
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News

Because crazies with a gun will follow this also

by Jeffrey Miller July 20, 2010
written by Jeffrey Miller

BATON ROUGE (AP) — Concealed handguns won’t be allowed in Roman Catholic churches, despite a new state law allowing them.
“We don’t think it is appropriate to have guns in churches,” Danny Loar, executive director of the Louisiana Conference of Catholic Bishops — the church’s public policy arm in Louisiana, said Monday.

The law allows concealed handguns in churches, synagogues or mosques for those with a valid permit and training. It also says those with authority over a church have the final say in their church.

Bishops discussed the issue when reviewing bills, Loar said.

“The bishops decided that, if the bill became law, the bishops would let their pastors know that this would not be permissible in Catholic churches,” Loar said.

The previous law let only law enforcement officials carry concealed weapons into churches.

Loar said he notified Louisiana’s bishops by e-mail shortly after Gov. Bobby Jindal signed state Rep. Henry Burns’ bill into law on July 6. [Source]

But what if I bring this gun?

* Photo: Confiscated from Mexican drug lord earlier this year.

July 20, 2010 8 comments
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Punditry

Atheist Sacramentals

by Jeffrey Miller July 19, 2010
written by Jeffrey Miller

Since the atheist de-batism using a hairdryer marked reason is making the news again – here are my comments from almost a year ago today.

In a type of mock ceremony that’s now been performed in at least four states, a robed “priest” used a hairdryer marked “reason” in an apparent bid to blow away the waters of baptism once and for all. Several dozen participants then fed on a “de-sacrament” (crackers with peanut butter) and received certificates assuring they had “freely renounced a previous mistake, and accepted Reason over Superstition.”

For Gray, the lighthearted spirit of last summer’s Atheist Coming Out Party and De-Baptism Bash in suburban Westerville, Ohio, served a higher purpose than merely spoofing a Christian rite.

“It was very therapeutic,” Gray said in an interview. “It was a chance to laugh at the silly things I used to believe as a child. It helped me admit that it was OK to think the way I think and to not have any religious beliefs.”

…Atheist Gary Mueller recently mailed his de-baptism certificate to St. Bonaventure Catholic Church in Concord, Calif., and asked to be dropped from its baptismal record. The church told him, in effect, that he was all wet.

“While we do not remove a name/person from a Baptism register, we can note alongside your name that ‘you have left the Roman Catholic Church,’ ” the Rev. Richard Mangini replied in an e-mail. “I hope that God surprises you one day and lets you know that He is quite well.” [reference]

As a former atheist I would like to debunk what they are saying, but since I can only rely on superstition and not reason I am unable to. When I became Catholic I had to sign one of those documents about promising to abstain from reason and other bad habits I had picked up in a lifetime of atheism. In the last ten years I have been much happier now that religion is a crutch and life is easier now also since I don’t have to think anymore and can just blindly follow some foreign guy in a robe! I embrace my sheepleness.

Besides reason is not what it is cracked up to be. Just what had it done for St. Augustine, St. Thomas Aquinas. Pascal, or even our present Pope? Remember that encyclical Pope John Paul II wrote “Faith and Superstition”? Oh wait.

Now if these people were serious about giving up Christianity and the fruits of Christendom, they should also denounce hospitals, universities, and even modern science, and of course acts of charity. They want to denounce Christianity while at the same time enjoying the fruits of it.

Atheist with hair dryer marked reason

I am so glad that this man showed us how to use reason! Forming judgments by a process of logic always leads you to sticking a piece of paper with REASON on it to a hair dryer. Mocking Christians with phony rituals that have not ability to cancel out an ontological change screams reason. Though ‘Reason itself is a matter of faith,” G. K. Chesterton wrote. ”It is an act of faith to assert that our thoughts have any relation to reality at all.”

Faith and reason are like two wings on which the human spirit rises to the contemplation of truth; and God has placed in the human heart a desire to know the truth–in a word, to know himself–so that, by knowing and loving God, men and women may also come to the fullness of truth about themselves. – Pope John Paul II Fides et Ratio.

The Catholic Key blog titled the post on this “Atheists Need Better liturgists” Actually a stunt as silly as this sounds just like something a liturgist would recommend. Rocks in baptismal fonts and blow-dryers marked reason kind of go together.

July 19, 2010 6 comments
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NewsParody

Jesuits Gone Wild Volume ???

by Jeffrey Miller July 19, 2010July 19, 2010
written by Jeffrey Miller

This video reminds me of a previous parody.

[Via Creative Minority Report]

You have ordered those DVDs and video tapes off late night TV always looking for the latest thrill. After a while though you wait for something new and daring that hasn’t been done before. That is you have waited until now for our great new set of DVD titles.

Jesuits Gone Wild!

We have taken our video cameras to Jesuit institutions across the United States to bring you the latest in entertainment. What you ask – Jesuit Universities? – how boring. These are not your daddy’s Jesuit Universities!!!


* Pictures from here

Volume 1 takes you inside the annual drag show at Santa Clara University – you guessed it – a Jesuit institution. Now you might balk that these were officially sanctioned by the university and that we are selling these videos under false pretenses. Not only is Santa Clara University officially approve these events they are also promoted as educational.

July 19, 2010July 19, 2010 0 comment
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News

Not counting down

by Jeffrey Miller July 18, 2010
written by Jeffrey Miller

There have been some countdowns to the retirement age for some bishops and archbishops.  Here though is a bishop whose 75th birthday is not eagerly awaited by his flock.

For the past 18 years, Bruskewitz has served as bishop of the Catholic Diocese of Lincoln.

In September, when he turns 75, Bruskewitz will submit a letter of resignation to Pope Benedict XVI, as is required by Code of Canon Law. It will then be up to the pope to replace him, which could take as little as a few days or as long as several years.

“It’s always better to wear out than rust out,” he says, reiterating an oft-heard saying.

“And so, I think that as long as I can do something, I am happy to do it,” Bruskewitz said of the fluidity of his retirement.

Regardless of the official date, Bruskewitz admits he is “psyched” about all the free time ahead. God willing, he plans to stay in Lincoln writing, fishing, pheasant hunting with his new dog Quincy, and devoting time to learning the intricacies of computer technology.

At times, Bruskewitz’s reign over the 136 churches in the 23,844 square miles of the Lincoln Diocese across southern Nebraska has been controversial. But it’s always clear and direct.

His detractors paint a portrait of a devout but stubborn man with unyielding orthodoxy and ultra-conservative views of God’s word and expectations of the Catholic Church.

His supporters extol those very same traits as his virtues.

He is a leader and a teacher. He is principled. Kind. Charitable. Charismatic. Decisive. Resolute.

He is intelligent and educated. He knows eight languages: English, Italian, German, Spanish, French, Latin, Greek and Hebrew.

He is an entertaining storyteller with a shrewd sense of humor and an infectious laugh.

But above all, he is a man of God.

“God rules the diocese and I am just his instrument,” Bruskewitz said during a recent interview from the library in the Catholic Chancery.

“I am not a dictator. But I do think that bishops have, by Catholic doctrine, the three-fold duty to teach, to sanctify and to govern the Catholic people … in spiritual matters,” Bruskewitz said. “I don’t try to govern people in partisan political matters.”

It is a responsibility that Bruskewitz has never craved.

“But if the responsibility is given to me and I have to answer to God for its use, I think it is better that I use it and ensure that the diocese is in conformity with the universal church and the perennial teaching of the Catholic Church,” he said.

Here is a bishop whose controversies were because he acted as a bishop in the care of his flock.

Cleansing Fire lists to another article with an amazing list of the bishop’s accomplishments in a diocese with a rather small Catholic population.

July 18, 2010 7 comments
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PunditrySame-Sex Attraction

Conscience Claws

by Jeffrey Miller July 18, 2010
written by Jeffrey Miller

LINCOLN, Nebraska, July 5, 2010 (LifeSiteNews.com) — Defying the recommendations of Nebraska’s top public health authority, the Nebraska Mental Health Practice Board has approved rules that could force Christian psychologists to refer clients with same-sex attraction seeking relationship therapy to professionals that support homosexuality. However, the chief medical officer has said she would not approve the new rules until a compromise is reached.

While still allowing psychologists to decline to offer services, the board followed the state Board of Psychology in rejecting a rules change that would allow psychologists not to refer clients to counseling encouraging immoral behavior.

Jim Cunningham, executive director of the Nebraska Catholic Conference (NCC), has maintained that it would be morally objectionable for a Catholic counselor to make such a referral.

“Our concern had to do with services that we would not be able to provide because they would promote or enhance or validate conduct that is contrary to our religious beliefs,” NCC’s Cunningham said. The NCC has also asked for conscience protection for for licensed counselors, social workers and marriage and family therapists.

But the issue has aroused stiff controversy within the Nebraska government: Chief Medical Officer Dr. Joann Schaefer has repeatedly stated that the needs of clients with same-sex attraction and the consciences of Catholic physicians may both be satisfied by a compromise, despite reluctance on the part of state licensing boards to consider one.

Until Schaefer approves the regulations, they cannot take affect, and Schaefer has promised to delay approval until a compromise is reached.

According to Schaefer, when a party claims that a regulation “is infringing upon our rights or certain parts of our business, or our freedoms,” Nebraska’s Health and Human Services department always seeks a compromise.

“At that point we are forced to try to accommodate and make our regulations better,” she said. “This is a large contingency saying that this rule is infringing on their religious freedom. It is a big deal.” [Source]

Just another cause of the government getting their claws in the consciences of religious believers. “If we allow you to keep your job believing as you do you must refer to people who violate your conscience.” So I guess if an alcoholic wants treatment and the psychologist believes that not only is getting drunk gravely sinful and that it damages his life they should refer them to a psychologist who believes alcoholism is linked to hereditary and really is a normal condition. Somebody with some degree of same-sex attraction needs help and that does not mean affirming their same-sex attraction. So much of modern psychology would never have helped someone like Ex-Lesbian Janet Boynes and would have worked to keep her miserable by affirming her as a lesbian.

The reality is that they want to force psychologists to refer patients to people who will not help them in the underlying cause of their problem and can even increase problems for that person.   Distractors of course will say opposition to this plan is hatred of those with same-sex attraction failing to see that is pure bigotry to always see someone’s motives as hatred.  I would totally disagree with those psychologists who  see same-sex attraction as perfectly normal, but I would not see this as hatred towards these persons even though they are not helping them.  We live in a time though where opposition to homosexual acts can only mean hatred and that justifies any clamping down on conscience claims.

July 18, 2010 0 comment
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ParodyPro-life

Sound of Silence

by Jeffrey Miller July 18, 2010July 18, 2010
written by Jeffrey Miller

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) was honored on Thursday by the Planned Parenthood Federation of America (PPFA), who celebrated the Speaker with one of two annual Champions of Women’s Health Awards.

From Lifesite

In a statement, PP lauds Pelosi for having been “instrumental” in the passage of the federal health care bill, which was strenuously opposed by every major pro-life organization in the U.S., as well as the U.S. Catholic bishops, because of its abortion mandate. The statment also praises Pelosi for having “led her female colleagues in Congress as they stood strong against attempts to insert the Stupak abortion ban into the bill.”

“With their steadfast commitment to passing health care reform and making sure that women will be able to get the health care they need, the women leaders we honor today set the course to change the lives of millions of women for generations to come,” said PP President Cecile Richards.

We also learned within the last week that the Obama administration authorized federal taxpayer funding of abortions under high risk insurance programs created under the new national health care plan President Barack Obama signed. So far this funding has been found for three states by the National Right to Life Committee. Isn’t it great to have Catholic Kathleen Sebelius as head of Health and Human Services.

Planned Parenthood is of course correct to honor Rep. Nancy “Ardent Catholic” Pelosi for all she had done to help murder children and to direct business to Planned Parenthood.

Bishop Niederauer the Archbishop of San Francisco was outraged by one of his flock receiving and deserving such an honor by Planned Parenthood and issued a blazing and clear statement about how you can’t be a good Catholic and pro-abortion. Now where was the link to that statement? Oh wait I must of dreamed that one – wishful thinking perhaps. The reality is that the Bishop has not mentioned Nancy Pelosi since he joined a bunch of other Bishops in condemning her using St. Thomas Aquinas to support abortion back in August of 2008. Since then she has issued equally ignorant statements and continued to talk about herself being a devout Catholic while ramming through the horrific health care bill.

Bishops certainly don’t have to go nuclear in the case of pro-abotion politicians and there is certainly a wide degree of prudence at the disposal of bishops concerning their flock. Certainly there must come a point when you admit that all attempts have failed and his meeting with Nancy Pelosi was to no avail. In the USCCB’s commentary on Matthew 18:15-20:

Passing from the duty of Christian disciples toward those who have strayed from their number, the discourse now turns to how they are to deal with one who sins and yet remains within the community. First there is to be private correction (Matthew 18:15); if this is unsuccessful, further correction before two or three witnesses (Matthew 18:16); if this fails, the matter is to be brought before the assembled community (the church), and if the sinner refuses to attend to the correction of the church, he is to be expelled (Matthew 18:17). The church’s judgment will be ratified in heaven, i.e., by God (Matthew 18:18).

As an Armchair Bishop my pronouncements on the acts of bishops does not matter much if at all. It just seems to me that the majority of bishops just never get to the 2nd and especially the 3rd step of the Matthew 18 guide. Nancy Pelosi flagrant opposition to her Catholic faith and obstinately persevering in manifest grave sin deserves more of an action then thus far has occurred. It appears that her medicinal correction for her support of abortion is silence. This is the Spanish Inquisition as imagined by Monty Python. “Fetch the Comfy Chair!” It is of course not that I want Nancy Pelosi punished for her support of abortion, I love her enough to want her to repent and to be within full communion of the Church and I don’t see how silence by her shepherd helps her.

In light of this silence I suggest a new Coat of Arms for Archbishop Niederauer.

You don’t have to be an expert in Ecclesiastical heraldry to figure this one out.

Thanks via Twitter to Fr. Joseph for the Latin translation of “Sound of Crickets.” Thanks also to Infornoxv, FrCharles, and KathlinGilbert for also replying.

July 18, 2010July 18, 2010 5 comments
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About Me

Jeff Miller is a former atheist who after spending forty years in the wilderness finds himself with both astonishment and joy a member of the Catholic Church. This award-winning blog presents my hopefully humorous and sometimes serious take on things religious, political, and whatever else crosses my mind.

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Jeff Miller is a former atheist who after spending forty years in the wilderness finds himself with both astonishment and joy a member of the Catholic Church. This award winning blog presents my hopefully humorous and sometimes serious take on things religious, political, and whatever else crosses my mind.
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