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The Curt Jester

"It is the test of a good religion whether you can joke about it." GKC

News

If only liberal gay-activists in Massachusetts

by Jeffrey Miller February 18, 2008
written by Jeffrey Miller

could get married

February 18, 2008 6 comments
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News

Paying through Praying

by Jeffrey Miller February 17, 2008
written by Jeffrey Miller

A meal and a drink in Croatia may not cost you anything except for maybe a few Hail Mary’s after a parish opened up a "prayer café" in an effort to bring youths back to church.

Catholic News Service reports Salesian Fr Damir Stojic thought up the scheme to keep the kids from going to other cafés after church and come together for a meal after Eucharist.

" In the Acts of the Apostles, it says the disciples used to come together for a meal after the Eucharist, so we’re following a biblical ideal," Fr Stojic said.

"A lot of kids used to head for neighbouring cafes after Mass here. We came up with this scheme for persuading them to hang out at the church instead."

The Jedno (Sail) cafe opened recently in a parish hall adjoining Zagreb’s Holy Spirit Church and attracts many of the students and young people attending the regular Sunday youth Mass.

"Student helpers thought up the idea of paying with prayers. We have encouraged parents to donate food and drink for the café," he said.

"Jedno could be seen as continuing a tradition since most Salesian parishes worldwide ran cafes at their churches."

Prices at Jedno vary from three Our Fathers for a standard cup of coffee to a more expensive Coca-Cola (five Hail Marys and a Glory Be), while a cappuccino costs four Our Fathers.

His post continues with advice on a number of subjects common to the confessional.

Article

Great idea, but what happens when inflation sets in. I can imagine people complaining in later years "I remember when a cappuccino cost just four Our Fathers and now you have to whip out a mystery of the Rosary and five Glory Be’s."

February 17, 2008 7 comments
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Other

Confessional Advice

by Jeffrey Miller February 17, 2008
written by Jeffrey Miller

Fr. Philip Powell, OP has a great post on confession advice that starts with:

I. Starting point:

1. Sin. When we sin we abuse a gift from God. Just about every sin we commit can be traced back to a disordered use of some grace we have received from God. Abusing God’s gifts is a dangerous practice b/c it is through the charitable use of our divine gifts for others that God perfects His love us. If you are not using your gifts for the benefit of others then God’s love is not being perfected in you.

2. Forgiveness. When we ask for forgiveness we are not asking God to do something He has not already done. All of our sins are forgiven right now. All of them. Then why go to confession? God gives us forgiveness always, constantly, without ceasing. We go to confession to receive His forgiveness. Let’s say I call you up and tell you that I’ve purchased a nice Easter ham for you at Central Market. It’s a gift from me to you and your family. I give you this ham. For the ham to be a proper gift, you have to go get it. Once you have received the ham, it is a gift. The ham is no less real b/c you haven’t picked it up yet. The ham doesn’t materialize out of thin air when you go to Central Market and ask for it. The ham is just sitting there waiting for you to come ask for. The same is true for God’s forgiveness. Just ask and you will receive.

3. Charity. Once you have received your gift of forgiveness, you need to put it into action as a gift for others. We do not have the option of failing to forgive. We are commanded to love and when we love, we forgive; i.e., You give your gift of divine forgiveness away by forgiving me my sins against you. In this way, you enact your most basic ministry as Christ to me.

His post continues with advice on a number of subjects common to the confessional.

February 17, 2008 1 comment
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Vocations

Ive been praying ever since

by Jeffrey Miller February 16, 2008
written by Jeffrey Miller

Here is another nice article concerning Belmont Abbey.

A burning sensation started in Anthony
Swoffords chest.

It felt like my whole chest was on fire, Swofford said. I was at my
house in my driveway. I felt like somebody reached inside my chest and
was holding on to my heart.

That was the day Swofford promised God he would not drink or take drugs
again.

Swofford was born and raised Catholic. He grew up in Chesnee, SC, where
his Catholic family was the only one in town.

I had very good parents that had very good ethics and morals,
Swofford said.

He struggled with drugs and alcohol for about 20 years.

I kind of got angry with God, Swofford said.

Eight years ago he went to rehab and started praying.

Ive been praying ever since, Swofford said. 

…After visiting the Benedictine monastery at Belmont Abbey, he knew
hed found the right place.

Ive always said that for 27 years, I did everything that I wanted to
do, Swofford said. I decided I was going to do whatever he (God)
wanted me to do.

Most of the article is pretty good as it
discusses monastic life, but I
found this a little off.

Whats the difference between priests
and monks?
The priest celebrates mass and administers the sacrament, said Father
John Oetgen. A monk doesnt.

Well not quite.  Correct me if I
am wrong but isn’t a monk someone who lives within a community of men
within a monastery and are normally made up of both priests and
brothers. I think many monks that are priests would be a little
surprised to find out that they don’t celebrate Mass or administer the
sacraments.  I bet this is a misquote.

February 16, 2008 5 comments
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HumorPunditry

Fake Christians

by Jeffrey Miller February 16, 2008
written by Jeffrey Miller

Catholic Minority Report has a video of
Charles Barkley
calling conservatives “Fake Christians” and
announcing how proud he is to be pro-gay and pro-abortion.

I heard the clip last night on Hugh
Hewitt’s show with Barkley going on and on that they are fake
Christians because they are commanded not to judge and that they do
indeed judge.  Often it seems among those that are of a
liberal persuasion that they only Bible verse they seem to know is the
one about judging others.  Often they are all about shades of
gray and nothing being simply black and white, yet when it comes to
this verse they become the most ardent fundamentalist and a “single
scripture thumper.”

Somehow though when they make the claims
of Christians being hypocrites
for judging others is that they never seem to see they irony that they
are judging that Christians are judging others.

I love when Alice Von Hildebrand talks
about here days of teaching in a
university and the conversations she would have with her students.
 When one complained that she was judging her she replied “How
dare you judge that I was judging you!”

Now this does not mean that Christians
have blanket approval to judge others.  Certainly we can never
make judgments as to someone’s eternal destiny and especially need to
totally avoid rash judgments.  As the late and great Fr.
Hardon, S.J. notes:

…Where the rash judgment begins is at
the point where we go beyond the
evidence available to judge the culpability of the action, attribute
evil motives, and decide against the character or moral integrity of
the person whose conduct we observed.

The sinfulness of rashly judging people, therefore, arises from two
sources: the hasty imprudence with which a critical judgment is
reached, and the loss of reputation that the person suffers in our
estimation because we have judged him adversely.

…
In order to control this inveterate tendency to praise ourselves and
blame others, it is necessary to leave both ourselves and others in
God’s hands and trust that, in the final judgment, the truth will then
appear. Those who deserve to be rewarded will receive the merit they
had earned; those who are to be punished will be visited by their just
deserts. In the meantime, i.e., during our mortal stay on earth, all
definitive judgments about people, whether ourselves or others, are
premature. Only God at the end of time has the right to decide
conclusively about the human heart.

But certainly we must judge the morality
of human acts.
 A conscience without judgment is no conscience at all and it
is a
properly formed conscience that is best able to judge.  First
and
foremost we must judge are own moral actions. But it would be
impossible to follow St. Paul’s maxim “”Bad company ruins good morals.”
if we couldn’t judge the actions of others and to determine that they
were bad company.  It would also be impossible to pray for the
conversion of others if we could not judge.  The Reductio ad
absurdum of this is quite obvious on any serious reflection and Charles
Barkley as a moral theologian is a good basketball player.

Thinking on this subject here is a product
I would like to see and could sure use at times.

Rash Judgment CremeSt.
Johnson and & St. Johnson’s introduces the product you have
been waiting for.  Have you ever broke out in a rash
judgment?  If so you will love Rash Judgment Creme. 
Rash Judgments often leave you irritable and at times even your face
turns red when you breakout in an angry rash judgment.

Rash judgments are caused by contact hastititis and can only be cured
with generous applications of charity.  St. Johnson and
& St. Johnson’s Rash Judgment Creme patented product with Aloe
Veritas helps you to discern human moral acts based on the truth of the
evidence and not from bias and prejudices.

You will be surprised at how much happier you will be when your rash
judgment goes away leaving you with a clear and spotless conscience.

Warning:
If your rash judgment fails to go away after a
Rash Judgment Creme after two week of treatment it is highly
recommended that you see a Doctor of the Church. St. Francis de Sales
as a great teacher on charity is highly recommended along with many
other Doctors of the Church and their associates.

February 16, 2008 11 comments
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Vocations

Daughters of Mary, Mother of Israel's Hope

by Jeffrey Miller February 15, 2008
written by Jeffrey Miller

SACRAMENTO, CA (CNS) – Rosalind Moss,
an author who is an Eternal Word Television Network TV host and one of
the network’s radio hosts, announced Feb. 13 that she is starting a new
community of sisters in the Archdiocese of St. Louis with the
permission of Archbishop Raymond L. Burke.

The new group will be called the Daughters of Mary, Mother of Israel’s
Hope, she told an audience of more than 200 at the Catholic Breakfast
Club of Sacramento.

Moss, 65, said she hopes to move to St. Louis within a few months,
intends to fulfill as many of her scheduled speaking engagements in the
coming year as possible, and plans to continue her radio program from
St. Louis.

She is working now on designing a floor-length habit, along with a
basket to hold religious articles which sisters will distribute both in
the poorest areas of the city and the richest.

“The purpose of this religious community is to flood the world with
holy habits as signs to God,” said Moss, who is also a staff apologist
with Catholic Answers, a nonprofit organization dedicated to promoting
the Catholic faith through all forms of media.

…”I want to tell the world that God hasn’t left. He is still here. We
are loved by the God who made us for himself. I want to show there is
no such thing as secular and religious. There is no division. All is
from God,” she said.

Moss said her group will be an evangelistic, teaching community
following in the spiritual tradition of St. Francis de Sales, whose
writings and sermons inspired many to convert to Catholicism. She
already has a few women who plan to join her, she added.

“I’ll come back to Sacramento one day in a habit,” said Moss. “Hold
nothing back from God.”

This is great news.  I often
listen to Rosalind Moss on Catholics Answers and she has such a deep
spirituality and a great empathy for others in being able to give them
spiritual direction.

Article

February 15, 2008 11 comments
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News

Belmont Abbey College

by Jeffrey Miller February 15, 2008
written by Jeffrey Miller

Manassas, VA – Belmont Abbey College in
North Carolina has amended the health insurance plan provided by its
carrier to remove coverage for abortions, voluntary sterilizations and
contraception.  The provisions allowing these practices were
recently discovered. and the college moved quickly to rectify the
situation.  The college has since been faced with complaints
from a few employees to state and federal agencies, but remains
undaunted.

President William Thierfelder said, As a Roman Catholic institution,
Belmont Abbey College is not able to and will not offer nor subsidize
medical services that contradict the clear teaching of the Catholic
Church.  There was no other course of action possible if we
were to operate in fidelity to our mission and to our identity as a
Catholic college.

According to Cardinal Newman Society (CNS) president Patrick J. Reilly,
Belmont Abbey is a faithful Catholic college, and this action
reinforces it.  We applaud the steadfastness of President
Thierfelder and Abbot Placid Solari, the college chancellor, in keeping
fidelity to Catholic teachings a clear priority of the institution.

Reilly noted that the college was undaunted by complaints filed by a
few personnel with the federal Equal Employment Opportunity Commission
and the North Carolina Department of Insurance.  He said, We
hope that these few disgruntled employees will be rebuffed in their
efforts to use the power of government to intervene in a matter of
faith.

I have heard good things about Belmont Abbey and it is no surprise that
his is where Patrick Madrid has chosen to setup his Envoy Institute.

Article

February 15, 2008 8 comments
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Humor

Be my Methodius

by Jeffrey Miller February 14, 2008
written by Jeffrey Miller

Very few of us will walk up to someone
today and greet him or her with the words, Happy St. Cyrils Day, or
even Happy Cyrils Day. And surely no one will tell their sweetheart
to Be my Methodius.

And yet, today the universal Church commemorates Sts. Cyril and
Methodius, not St. Valentine, notwithstanding the latters
larger-than-life appeal.

Sts. Cyril and Methodius, brothers from what in biblical times was
known as Thessalonica, were ninth-century missionaries to the Slavic
people in Eastern Europe. Not only did they learn the oral language of
the people, but they developed an alphabet and written language so that
the Bible and liturgical texts could be translated into the living
language of the people. They were truly remarkable men of God.

Leon Suprenant has a good point especially
since we have no idea which St. Valentine this day is named after.

Surely Sts. Cyril and Methodius are much
more cool being brother Bishops and  brothers and how many
people have invented a language that is still used today?
 Their missionary work and the spread of the Gospel surely
warrant more attention than they get on the memorial.  But
then again considering performances of the Vagina Monologue, official
New York City brand condom giveaways, and all the other nonsense that
goes on this day  – I bet they are happy to take a back seat
to St. Valentine and quite happy that this stuff does not get
attributed to them.  Though we might want to give a shout out
to the St. Valentine and commiserate with him because surely if he
wasn’t in the Beatific Vision he would be a little down today. 

February 14, 2008 11 comments
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News

Waiting period waived for Sister Lucia

by Jeffrey Miller February 13, 2008
written by Jeffrey Miller

VATICAN CITY — Pope Benedict XVI has
put Sister Lucia, the last of three shepherd children who claimed to
have seen the Virgin Mary during apparitions in 1917 in Fatima, on a
fast-track to possible sainthood, the Vatican said Wednesday.

The customary waiting period before beginning the process that can lead
to sainthood is five years after a person’s death.

The case of Sister Lucia, who died in 2005 at age 97, was granted the
same waiver as was given in the cases of Mother Teresa and Pope John
Paul II.

The Vatican said Cardinal Jose Saraiva Martins, who is prefect of the
Vatican’s Congregation for the Causes of Saints, made the announcement
during a Wednesday evening Mass at the cathedral in Coimbra, Portugal,
marking the third anniversary of Lucia’s death.

Article

February 13, 2008 3 comments
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Politics

How does this make sense?

by Jeffrey Miller February 13, 2008
written by Jeffrey Miller

 Political strategist Donna
Brazile said she will quit her position with the Democratic National
Committee if superdelegates decide who gets the Democratic presidential
nomination.

The superdelegate vote should reflect the will of the people,
Brazile, who managed Al Gores 2000 presidential campaign and is
herself a superdelegate, told National Public Radio. 

Help me out here.  Exactly what is the point of the Democrat’s
superdelegates if they can’t trump popular vote? If they always go
along with the popular vote then it is a rubber stamp and serves no
purpose.  Donna Brazile was made a superdelegate by Bill
Clinton so certainly she has had time to figure out what the role is
all about.  I guess she likes having two votes more than
actually quitting this position now.

I think the superdelegates are exactly like the pigs in Animal Farm.

February 13, 2008 10 comments
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About Me

Jeff Miller is a former atheist who after spending forty years in the wilderness finds himself with both astonishment and joy a member of the Catholic Church. This award-winning blog presents my hopefully humorous and sometimes serious take on things religious, political, and whatever else crosses my mind.

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About Me

Jeff Miller is a former atheist who after spending forty years in the wilderness finds himself with both astonishment and joy a member of the Catholic Church. This award winning blog presents my hopefully humorous and sometimes serious take on things religious, political, and whatever else crosses my mind.
My conversion story
  • The Curt Jester: Disturbingly Funny --Mark Shea
  • EX-cellent blog --Jimmy Akin
  • One wag has even posted a list of the Top Ten signs that someone is in the grip of "motu-mania," -- John Allen Jr.
  • Brilliance abounds --Victor Lams
  • The Curt Jester is a blog of wise-ass musings on the media, politics, and things "Papist." The Revealer

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