I thinks I will get involved with a new and probably profitable career path. I think I will become a Ten Commandments Feng Shui expert. Now you might ask what the heck is that and what would be the need for one? Well the Supreme Court basically said that each government sponsored Ten Commandments exhibit demands scrutiny to determine whether it goes too far in amounting to a governmental promotion of religion. That each display should be resolved on a case by case-by-case basis. Looking over the decision how this is to be done is more of an art than a science. It depends on both location and and being contexualized with other documents. In the Kentucky case the display was revised to include nine framed documents which included the KJ version of the commandments in a display labeled "The Foundations of American Law and Government Display." and this also did not meet approval.
So how do states determine if their displays are constitutional especially since it doesn’t depend on the Constitution or the First Amendment? That is where Ten Commandments Feng Shui enters in. I would look for a harmonious display that reflects the balance of nature in the displays depending on the amount of wood, fire, earth, metal and water used in their compositions. I will check for Constitutional Yin and Yang and if I find the necessary are elements present and that they have the proper flow I would then give them a certificate of blessing. The great thing about this scam – I mean job – is that no one can argue with your Ten Commandments Feng Shui interpretation using the text of the courts decision. I mean good luck figuring that one out and determining any real guidelines.
There is a Black Hat Sect school of Feng Shui and I will be starting the Black Robe school of Ten Commandments Feng Shui. The great thing about calling it Ten Commandments Feng Shui is that it will keep the ACLU off my back. As long as it sounds new agey and not Christian in any way they won’t bother me. So state governments give me a call and I will come and apply the art of Ten Commandments Feng Shui and make any necessary recommendations so that they meet with the optimum flow of Constitutional qi.
Just call it “Ten Rules Feng Shui” and make sure to sprinkle your dialogue with “the chi of” in front of any phrases that might tip off the anti-religious crowd. Also, keep a thesaurus handy… “Honor thy immediate ancestors” instead of “Honor thy father and mother” is an example.
Then write books based on it; e.g. “Ten Rules Feng Shui for Positive Performers” and “Ten Rules in the Classroom”. Then you start up the multinational corporation with seminars, books, planners, etcetera! 😉
Make it a very heavy monument situated casually amidst a lot of other heavy monuments, all turned with backs to the sidewalk. Invent some chi stuff to explain the genius of forcing people to (gasp) walk on the grass in order to see it. Believe one of the justices admitted that the weight of the monument (in pounds) held enough weight to tip the court. Also the age: be sure it has Chinese moss on it here and there.
Dang. Wrong moniker. Still a Cradle Catholic but sans blog.
I just don’t get that whole thing. I always feng when I should shui!
Just make sure you have your bagua set before you begin your construction. Otherwise you may divorce the the proper colors from their respective areas. Then you could get fame with yellow and metal. Heh, we all know how that one ends up!
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