Products as metaphors
Are you a Sunday only Christian? Or do you only attend church on Christmas, Easter and Ash Wednesday if your Catholic? Do your friends and co-workers have no idea you're a Christian? If so than you will probably think this product is a great idea. From the manufactures who brought you tasteless salt and stealth technology to hide cities set on a hill comes the latest innovation - the Basket Light!
This decorative basket contains a high quality lamp fixture and UL rated cord. Use a high or low wattage light bulbs as you desire since the basket is granted not to emit any light at all! Perfect for those concerned about light pollution since our basket lamp will keep you totally in the dark. Nobody will know that there is actually a light shining within.
Our basket light includes our patented burned out light indicator since this is the only way you can tell when the light has burned out.
If it makes sense for you to be a Christian and not have it modify how you live your life you will just love a lamp that also will have no influence on the dark around it. Why must a lamp be put on a lampstand? Why be tied to traditions such as using a lamp for light to see with? Just as people don't know you're a Christian, they won't know this is a lamp either when they see it in your house (if they can without light).
Order now and we will send you a free basket case!
Check out some of our celebrity testimonials:
"Wow this lamp influences the dark as much as my faith influences the way I vote." - Sen. John Kerry.
"Amazing! You can tell that this is a lamp just as easily as you can discern that I am a Catholic." - Gov. Jennifer Granholm
Known as 
great product for the C&E Catholics (Christmas and Easter).
C & E Catholics are "Submarine Catholic" because they only surface in church twice a year...
We (my 5 siblings and I) used to call them "creasters"...as in, "You'd better go to Christmas morning/Easter morning Mass early, 'cause you KNOW all the 'creasters' will be there and you won't be able to find a parking spot!".
lilies and poinsettas is what the easter/christmas only attendees are called around here.
Is the blame entirely theirs, those whom can't stand to come to Mass but twice a year? Yes, they have not persisted in the faith, but were they ever inspired by example of clergy or laity to whole-hearted devotion? Hard to say, gang, hard to say..
My old parish had a wonderful custom of reminding the regulars before Christmas and Easter to "arrive at Mass early and park far away, so the C+E folks won't arrive late to find no parking and go home."
I like that spirit!
I also saw this:
"This lamp lights the room just as my conscience lights my mind when I realize I have committed manslaughter." -Sen. Ted Kennedy
I know that this is very un-Christian, but sometimes as I am dragging my 4 young children to Christmas and Easter mass 45 minutes early (knowing that they will self destruct in the middle of Mass), I wish my Church would come up with some way to ensure the regulars get seats. I wish they would place "reserved" on 75% of the seats and only those who attend Mass regularly would know that the "reserved" seats are for anyone. The C&E's would be left with the other 25%. I know that this makes me terrible, but just one Christmas it would be nice!
We call the two timers reindeers and bunnies (we don't even bother giving them liturgical leaning names if they only show up twice a year.) at our parish.
Maggie
We call them CEOs - Christmas, Easter and Occasional.
Becky, there actually was that practice in the old churches - pews had the family name written on a paper placard that fit in a holder on the end of the pew. Somehow money was involved -tithing? Renting? I read a reference to it in the biography "Parish Priest" (good book, BTW), but it called it "paid for seating".
"Wow this lamp influences the dark as much as my faith influences the way I vote."- Sen. John Kerry
LOL!!!!!!
We call these catholics "Bi-habitual". They're the ones who, during mass, you will hear them say to their 7 year old "Oh, that pretty lady is the Virgin Mary, she was Jesus' mommy" or "Oh no sweetie, that's not Jesus, that's his Daddy Joseph I think".
Please tell me there are at least a few Catholic politicians who won't be buying this!
Gov. Granholm attends the student parish at Michigan State University . . . come to think of it, certain "pastoral staff" members probably could use one of these.
Regarding the Catholics who only come to Mass for their baptism, wedding & funeral, our Priest calls them the "Hatch, Match & Dispatch Catholics"
:)
I totally understand where people come from regarding "C&E" Catholics because it's frustrating to have nowhere to sit or park, especially with young ones. But you know what I think Jesus would say: "Get over it. Just be glad they're here and welcome them so that maybe they come back all the time."
lol, Amy G. l have to laugh. You're right. Bitch and moan and bitch and moan, but we forget sometimes in our little comfort zones that no one gets boxed seating in the church, nor do we get to choose who enters or sits with us. Sometimes a Country Club mentality emerges with in the pews. This doesn't work well.